What a roller coaster we've
had with the Russians this year. First we were at a high thinking, as we do
every four years, that the Olympics would be must-see TV, an international
blast (disclaimer: I’m using “blast” figuratively; I’m not in favor of blowing shit up).
But then came stories of unfinished
venues, hotel piss water, side-by-side shitters, homo persecution, Pussy Riot
protests, and finally in grand Stalin style, stray dogs being rounded up and
taken off to the pooch gulag.
And then, in what should
have been a splendid evening, the opening ceremonies presented the world with a
broken Olympic Ring.
"Dear God", we all
thought, hurtling downward, "This is going to be a fucking disaster!"
Our nerves were calmed when
the games began and things began to look up.
Every day was a great day in Sochi and it looked like the Rooskies were
going to pull it off, after all. Then
came the 70 degree weather, obliterating the ski venues like MacArthur's Park
melting in the dark, all the sweet cream icing flowing down and once we again
we screamed as we rocketed down the tracks to a sure crash. But the weather held out just long enough, we
pulled back up again and even had a swell closing ceremony where the Russians
actually proved that they had a sense of humor.
Whew!! What a relief.
"Ya know" people
said, "The Rooskies did OK."
And then a week later, came
Crimea.
"Huh?" Said Putin.
"Wha?”
"Who?”
“Us?"
"We don't have any
troops in the Crimea" he told the press as we watched live TV feeds
showing heavily armed troops wearing "Kiss me, I'm Russian" buttons
march through Crimean neighborhoods.
So here we are again,
hurtling toward another abyss.
Just when I'm about to give
up on these sad Soviet sacks they come along and tantalize me with a blonde vs.
brunette chess tournament. Actually, the
fourth tournament in as many years. This
first, held in 2011, was won by the brunettes.
Then came the blondes turn and they took down the brunettes in 2012. The rubber match of the series was the 2013
tournament. As described on the web site, Chessdom.com:
"It was April 1st and the world's top chess players
were involved in the thrilling finale of the Candidates Tournament in London.
But at the same time the Central Chess Club in Moscow was the venue of fierce
fighting between Blondes and Brunettes who set out to determine the prevailing
color. This was the third match of the ladies. Two years ago Brunettes won, but
a year later the Blondes struck back. The third tournament was seen as an
opportunity to claim the supremacy of one color over another. The girls were
motivated, exchanging punches round after round, [Nice imagery, huh? Blondes
and brunettes slugging it out!!] but when the dust has cleared the overall
score was a 50:50 tie! The claim of supremacy will be postponed until the next
meeting."
Well the “next meeting” happened last week, and the
blondes prevailed as they outpunched the brunettes, final score 48.5 vs. 32.5.
So the blondes now lead the tournament series 2-1-1.
One thing for sure, the Russians (- Pooty) do have a
lighter side.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Blondes vs. Brunettes Powder Puff Football
Still no word on who won the game in Decatur, Alabama,
last Saturday. I would e-mail the organizers and ask but having done that
before, I know they would respond with some lame comment like “When you raise
money for a good cause, everybody wins!”
Oh, pleeeeeease!
What a crock of shit.
Hey, don’t get me wrong, I’ve donated mucho cash to the Alzheimer’s
Association since I discovered this event a few years back but you can’t
play-up the game for a year and then plead ignorance when folks ask who won.
That’s bullshit.
------------------------------------------------------
Elsewhere in the world, Malaysian
Flight 370 is still missing. A few weeks
back, we took a look at a few airline disaster movies, form a blonde vs.
brunette angle, of course.
Well, one more, a 1997 movie
Strategic Command.
From IMDb:
"Rick Harding is a former
Marine officer, now working in the FBI as a chemical weapons designer. While
packing up for the night, a group of armed soldiers led by wanted criminal
Carlos Gruber, break into the FBI research lab. They steal large amounts of a newly
created germ warfare chemical called Bromax-360, losing two of their men in the
process before escaping into the night."
The rest of the story
revolves around a Boeing 747 that is carrying the Vice President across the
country. The bad guys, and I’ll leave
out all of the ridiculous details of how the bad guys (+ a bad girl) manage to
infiltrate the plane with the Bromax 360 in their possession, take over the
plane completely and along the way, take the VP and his entourage hostage.
Every movie has to have at
least one big name star, and Strategic Command is no exception as it actually
has two: Michael Dudikoff and Paul Winfield. OK, maybe not so big, but they
have had many movie and TV roles and Winfield was nominated for an academy
award for his role in "Sounder" and also won an Emmy Award for TV
work. He had a long and distinguished
career, sadly passing away in 2004. Dudikoff's career spans three decades and
although he never won the acclaim won by Winfield, he has a large following.
Michael Cavanaugh, who plays the Vice President (of the United States) is also
a well know character actor.
The ladies? Well not exactly star materiel.
Among the VP’s entourage is
a hot blonde TV personality played by Amanda Wyss and a hot blonde Secret
Service agent played by Robin Lange.
The bad girl, played by Gina
Mari, is a hot dark-eyed brunette.
And she is bad, as in
super-bad. A classic evil brunette.
So there we have it: two hot blondes and one hot and bad brunette,
none of whom are big time actors, but at least they look great.
I’m not going to give you a
blow-by-blow account of the catfights: the video clip is worth a bazillion
words.
 |
| http://www.mediafire.com/watch/uu77moyn1n7xudg/Strategic_Command.wmv |
How does the movie end? The bad guys get what’s coming to them, i.e.,
they get shot or infected with the Bromax.
Gina, the brunette bitch, gets sucked out the door at 30,000 feet ---
what a lovely way to die!
----------------------------------------------------------------
Not enough catfights for
you?
OK, here are some more
The first one if from the TV
show “Nikita” (I think).
The second fight is from a movie
I have listed as “Pasnico"; I really have no idea of that is the movie’s
name. It’s something that I downloaded from
the Runboard site, I suspect you have seen it before.
The third movie is also from
the Runboard site and I think it’s called “Aventurera” which Google Translate
service tells me means “adventuress”.
http://www.mediafire.com/watch/uq7u2689t5tl74c/Aventurera.wmv
The fourth is from a Turkish movie (I think
its Turkish) and it’s called (well, I think it’s called) “Dugun Gecesi”. By now you’re probably thinking that I have absolutely
no fucking idea what I’m doing and yessir, you would be correct with that
allegation.
http://www.mediafire.com/watch/r2p16fzpzg436oz/Dugun_Gecesi__1966.wmv
The last movie is called (maybe it’s called)
“Inara”.
Nice cleavage.
http://www.mediafire.com/watch/tbk1z94u5zebrbz/Inara.wmv
Lastly, an updated Leader
Board. Yup, I had to go back a few weeks
and capture all of that good action we’ve been watching, but I think it’s up to
date.
One last note -- due to **family activities** no blog entry next week on Easter Sunday!!
See you on the 27th of April and thanks as always for checking out the blog!!
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