The summer came fast, heating up into the 90s by early
June. Although living in a hotel and
dining out daily, I often found myself frequenting a local supermarket named
the "Price Chopper", which unlike Senor Frog's, is still there. Usually I'd stroll the aisles with a few
cocktails in me and enjoy the sights and scenes of healthy mid west gals in
shorts and flip flops. Among the
attractive females was a store employee, a middle aged blonde named Marilyn, as
in Monroe, except this Marilyn was a natural blonde. We chatted occasionally, and I had some odd fantasies
that she was actually attracted to me despite me being at least 15 years her
junior, maybe closer to 20, but the truth of the matter was that I wasn't
particularly in tune with the whole MILF thing back then and women in their 40s
were as alien to me as something with tits from the planet Zontar. Compounding
my lack of interest was that the first half dozen times I talked to her she
wore a store smock and baggy trousers. Not
exactly attention getting apparel. It
wasn't until years later that I would look past work outfits and assess what a
gal would look like in more fashionable clothes.
Another occasional haunt of mine was the Leavenworth Rec
Center, not leastly because Don had recruited a couple of the Rec Center's bikini-clad
female lifeguards to wrestle each other. Beyond that, I had legitimate reasons,
like actually working out in the weight room.
As well, despite the fact that I was working long hours, I was also very
bored Monday to Friday and had volunteered to help coach Little League baseball
that spring, mainly as a way to stay away from booze and to keep from going
broke, but also because I enjoyed it and thought, well maybe one of these kids
has a good looking older sister. After
all, Jacky was only around on weekends.
Soon enough, Jacky began joining me at the Rec Center on
Saturday's and Sundays. You might think
that we would have spent most of our time in Kansas City, but given that she
would spend an entire week in St. Louis or KC, she was tired of all the hustle,
bustle, and traffic and really enjoyed the small town ambience of both
Leavenworth and Fort Leavenworth.
Besides, like any good Italian girl, she was more interested in love
making then going out on the town.
By late June, Jackie quickly took to the kids and vice
versa, and why not? At poolside she was
hot brunette in a bikini; when not in the pool, she would pull a tight t-shirt
over her string bikini top, stroll over to the gym area in her bare feet and
lift weights and play games with the kids.
No surprise, she got the attention of a few adults, too, most notably an
older fellow who helped out with the equipment and tried to keep the place
clean.
As Don had showed me, the pool was also populated with
attractive blonde lifeguards who naturally irritated Jacky, just by being there. Kris, in particular was a gorgeous blonde,
with huge blue eyes and clear white skin.
A few years younger than my cousin, she was about the same height and
weight as Jacky, but her back was broader and stronger and her athletic leg
muscles rippled with every step she took. Maybe at first she was trying to be
friendly with Jacky by walking over from the pool when Jacky was chatting and playing
with the young boys, or maybe she was trying to piss Jacky off by distracting
the boys from the sexy brunette. Whichever
it was, she succeeded in the latter and by mid July, Jacky would be steaming
when she saw Kris. "Typical
blonde" Jacky would say, "She has to come over here and jam her nose
into everything."
Given her irritation, my comment was to move our workouts
to the Fort Leavenworth gym that was better equipped (sans indoor pool) and had
become available to me as a contractor helping out the war gaming efforts. But Jacky had taken a liking to a bunch of
the young kids, most notably a young lad named Mark who, like Jacky, had black
hair and big dark brown eyes. In a short period of a few weeks, he had attached
himself to Jacky on weekends, kind of in a big sister, little brother way. Come
to think of it, they could have passed as family.
The whole time this little drama was being played out in
the Rec Center, Don was busy recruiting gals for his photo shoots. He had invested some cash in a 35mm single
lens reflex camera (the type that used a thing called "film", for those
of you who remember that type of stuff) and had also purchased a video recorder
that used VHS tapes as a recording medium.
Don's business plan of selling his goods to magazine such as Cavalier
and Nugget hadn't panned out the way he had hoped, but he was toying with the
idea of buying ad space in wrestling magazines, just like Curtis DuPont, Joan
Wise, and others, and selling his stuff.
Frankly, I thought it was a good idea and told him he ought to be able
to at least break even on his venture.
Although it took some time, Don finally picked up on my
hints and found a blonde and brunette who would wrestle. They were a couple of college girls, home on
break, that he recruited from god knows where.
Slim and attractive, the blonde was pretty, but maybe a bottle blonde,
and the brunette didn’t really fit my idea of the ideal brunette in that she
had medium brown hair and blue eyes. I
would have preferred a darker gal, but since watching the battle only cost me a
few dollars in film, I wasn’t about to complain.
It was a close, hard fought battle but the blonde won as
she outmaneuvered and outmuscled the brunette the entire match. I was definitely
disappointed but honestly couldn’t get that excited since the blonde looked
like she wasn’t a real blonde and the brunette was much to fair to serve as a
good contrast.
Still, driving back to my hotel I was a bit pissed. The blonde, real or fake, was definitely a better fighter. Don gave me a copy of the VHS tape a few days later. The brunette looked stronger than the blonde, in fact, she was stronger. Why didn't she win?
I started having problems concentrating at work. Contract proposals, invoices, reports, work schedules, and all I could think about was watching a battle between a blonde and a brunette. Good thing Jacky showed up, took me in her arms, stuck her tongue down my throat and sucked the wind out of me.
Although I had yet to mention anything to her, I was
keeping an eye on the advertisement about Buffalo Bill Cody Days, by which I
mean the ad that mentioned an amateur mud wrestling contest. Truth is, even
though it was a nightclub rage back in the 1980s, I was never really into
it. The biggest problem was that I could
never tell who was who.
Funny thing was that Marilyn had asked me about it one
day in Price Chopper, that is, whether or not I was attending. We bantered back and forth, she told me that
her daughter was going to wrestle and something about her daughter's boyfriend,
a fellow by the name of Lane. Marilyn
said her daughter had recently graduated from a local college (I don't remember
which one exactly, but it wasn't either KU or K-State), and had started working
part time in the store while she searched for a full time job as a
teacher.
"Oh, she's the new blonde in the cashier's
cage", Marilyn said. To which I
responded that here were so many pretty blondes around, I couldn't keep track
of them all!
She liked that.
Gosh, I thought to myself, Marilyn is an attractive woman,
I bet she would look great in a skirt and heels. I'm not exaggerating when I say she was a
cross between Anne Francis and maybe one of the Fox News Blondes, Martha
McCallum or Gretchen Carlson. (Oh, I'm sorry!
You don't like the Fox News blondes? Well, I'd use somebody from CNN or
MSNBC but neither CNN's Micheala Pereira nor MSNBCs Rachel Maddow quite fit the
description!)
So as I'm fantasizing about this 40-ish blonde, Marilyn
drops the fucking bomb on me.
"Gee" she said, "Maybe you and your girlfriend
could sign up for the mud wrestling."
Huh? Wha?
"Oh, I'm sorry" she said, "But I've seen
you in here with a pretty dark-haired girl and I thought maybe she was your
girlfriend."
We kicked that
around for a while.
"Yup, she's my gal."
"She's usually just here on weekends and that's why you
don't see her that often."
"I have no idea if she's interested in mud wrestling."
I was tempted to say she'd love to beat up a blonde, but
bit my tongue.
So … it seemed that Marilyn and her daughter, Linda, two
blondes, had been checking out me and Jacky, two brunettes.
Why?
So we could fight?
How interesting.
