Admin note: Sorry,
change of schedule. I’m so caught up in
the Olympics, I thought I’d focus on athletic events this week. We’ll do the “real deal” later.
------------------------------------------------------
So there I was, summer of 2008, taking a coffee break in this huge office complex that I call home for 10-14 hours a day. In middle age, one might as well simply devote themselves to work, pile up some retirement cash and hopefully insulate oneself from the unpredictable world of firings and layoffs.
Between the large buildings is a cafeteria boasting all the usual fattening vendors to include Starbucks. I wound my way down through the carpeted hallways of the building, padding along softly until I came up behind a couple of middle aged black women. Not wanting to barge past them, I silently hung behind as they gabbed and gossiped, strolling down the long corridor.
At one point, a hallway door opened and a lady named Angela came out along with three guys, two white and one black. Angela, who I knew only casually, was and hopefully still is (even though I have not seen her in a couple of years), absolutely gorgeous.
Age? I would estimate she was in her late 40s at the time.
Looks? Are you kidding me? About 5’9” in heels, blonde and blue, trim and fit, and a pair of legs to die for. An executive secretary, of course: who wouldn’t want such a nice fixture in their office?
And a real
southern belle too, from Virginia horse country. Smart, polite, an absolute lady in every way.
To get an idea of what she looked like, I always thought she resembled Donna Mills.
Anyway, Angela and her entourage come out in front of these two ~50ish black gals and it was clear that they knew the black fellow who was with Angela as they exchanged pleasantries with him. So we’re all strolling down this corridor with Angela and her butt sniffers moving out in front at a fast clip, followed by the two ladies, with me trailing silently on the carpet, just a few feet behind them.
As Angela and her friends pulled away and got out of earshot, one of the black gals says, “Of course he’s with her, all guys want to walk around with a girl like that … and will you PLEASE look at the legs on her, my God!”
And the other black gal says, “All those blonde girls have legs like that, that’s one of the reasons why the guys all love them.”
“Oh ain’t that the truth?” the other gal says.
At that point, I felt the need to clear my throat and let my presence be known. A moment of embarrassment that soon subsided, and then we chatted a while, me and the ladies. The three of us ended up at Starbucks and yes, I bought the coffees for them and then headed back to my office. Angela and her crew bypassed the cafeteria completely and kept walking out of the building.
What really struck me was that I had no idea that black women had this perspective about blonde women. So it was both an eye opening experience as well as a very funny episode, one that I’ll never forget.
Mmmmm … what does this have to do with athletics? Why nothing, actually. Except that last August I was back at the Starbucks getting coffee and I decided to take a break and watch one of the large TVs for a while.
Ah, the Olympics are on TV, beach volleyball, no less.
“Coming up next in women’s beach volleyball” said the announcer, “The United States versus Spain!”
Yep.
A couple of American blondes, Jennifer Kessy and April Ross vs. Elsa Baquerizo and big-assed Liliana Fernández.
Blondes vs. brunettes.
Since it was
mid-afternoon, well after lunch hour and the place was nearly empty, I decided
to settle in and watch.
Soon, a couple of the maintenance guys walked in, one of whom, by the name of Roger, I knew as he had been working in the building as an electrician for a number of years. Roger was a black guy, retired Navy sailor who worked as an electrician on various ships for more than 20 years. As I watched the American blondes beat on the Spanish brunettes, I decided to check in with the guys and pulse them. In the back of my mind I was thinking about the encounter with Angela a few years prior, so I approached the two fellows and asked them who they thought were going to win.
“Oh, the Americans, of course.” They said.
“Geez,” I replied “I didn’t even notice that those two girls were Americans. Hell, when I asked the question, I meant, ‘who’s going to win, the blondes or the brunettes?”
So now I’ve got the two guys laughing as we discuss the merits of blondes vs. brunettes and all agree that the blonde chicks are better athletes and will beat the brunettes from Spain.
“Man, those motherfuckin’ blond women!” the other guy kept saying over and over.
No sooner had we agreed on this topic of vital national interest, then one of the office blondes, Teri comes walking over, sipping a latte. Teri had been with the company for over 30 years as a graphic artist. Blonde and blue eyed, she had put on some weight over the years but still looked great, despite being well into her 60s. Like most blondes she had fabulous legs and I always took the time to remind her of that. But my real attraction to Teri was on account of her threatening to beat the shit out of Edy, my Puerto Rican lover, about 25 years earlier. We’ll save that for another blog entry.
Well, I couldn’t help but roping Teri into the blonde vs. brunette conversation and she eagerly took the bait. "Who's going to win?" she asked, repeating the question we had asked her, "The blondes, of course!!" she said with a big smile.
Well, the four of us chatted for some time, thoroughly enjoying the match as the blonde American gals hammered the dark haired Spaniards.
But here’s is the funny thing. As I prepared for this week’s blog entry I did some research and discovered that in women’s beach volleyball during the 2012 London Olympics, it was actually brunettes who dominated the blondes, not the other way around.
That’s right.
I looked up every team as part of my research; 24 teams in all played. Of those, 13 teams were a pair of blondes, seven teams were a pair of brunettes, and four teams were mixed: one blonde and one brunette. After going through the results of every game, I determined that there were 26 matches that featured two blondes against two brunettes and that the brunettes won 17 of those matches while the blondes won only nine. Yup, the brunettes won 65% of the matches against the blondes: not even close.
I tried breaking down the numbers different ways to include eliminating Asians (China and Mauritius) from the analysis but that didn’t really change the overall outcome, the blondes still only won about a third of the matches.
Now it is true that blonde teams defeated mixed teams at a slightly higher rate than the brunettes did, but that’s not a very convincing statistic.
So why on that day last August, did we all think the blondes were really the better athletes? I don’t know the answer to that.
But they do have better legs, that I know for a fact.
Just to save you the trouble, here are some You Tube links I know you’ll enjoy.
Italian brunettes defeat Russian blondes------------------------------------------------------
So there I was, summer of 2008, taking a coffee break in this huge office complex that I call home for 10-14 hours a day. In middle age, one might as well simply devote themselves to work, pile up some retirement cash and hopefully insulate oneself from the unpredictable world of firings and layoffs.
Between the large buildings is a cafeteria boasting all the usual fattening vendors to include Starbucks. I wound my way down through the carpeted hallways of the building, padding along softly until I came up behind a couple of middle aged black women. Not wanting to barge past them, I silently hung behind as they gabbed and gossiped, strolling down the long corridor.
At one point, a hallway door opened and a lady named Angela came out along with three guys, two white and one black. Angela, who I knew only casually, was and hopefully still is (even though I have not seen her in a couple of years), absolutely gorgeous.
Age? I would estimate she was in her late 40s at the time.
Looks? Are you kidding me? About 5’9” in heels, blonde and blue, trim and fit, and a pair of legs to die for. An executive secretary, of course: who wouldn’t want such a nice fixture in their office?
To get an idea of what she looked like, I always thought she resembled Donna Mills.
Anyway, Angela and her entourage come out in front of these two ~50ish black gals and it was clear that they knew the black fellow who was with Angela as they exchanged pleasantries with him. So we’re all strolling down this corridor with Angela and her butt sniffers moving out in front at a fast clip, followed by the two ladies, with me trailing silently on the carpet, just a few feet behind them.
As Angela and her friends pulled away and got out of earshot, one of the black gals says, “Of course he’s with her, all guys want to walk around with a girl like that … and will you PLEASE look at the legs on her, my God!”
And the other black gal says, “All those blonde girls have legs like that, that’s one of the reasons why the guys all love them.”
“Oh ain’t that the truth?” the other gal says.
At that point, I felt the need to clear my throat and let my presence be known. A moment of embarrassment that soon subsided, and then we chatted a while, me and the ladies. The three of us ended up at Starbucks and yes, I bought the coffees for them and then headed back to my office. Angela and her crew bypassed the cafeteria completely and kept walking out of the building.
What really struck me was that I had no idea that black women had this perspective about blonde women. So it was both an eye opening experience as well as a very funny episode, one that I’ll never forget.
Mmmmm … what does this have to do with athletics? Why nothing, actually. Except that last August I was back at the Starbucks getting coffee and I decided to take a break and watch one of the large TVs for a while.
Ah, the Olympics are on TV, beach volleyball, no less.
“Coming up next in women’s beach volleyball” said the announcer, “The United States versus Spain!”
Yep.
A couple of American blondes, Jennifer Kessy and April Ross vs. Elsa Baquerizo and big-assed Liliana Fernández.
Blondes vs. brunettes.
Soon, a couple of the maintenance guys walked in, one of whom, by the name of Roger, I knew as he had been working in the building as an electrician for a number of years. Roger was a black guy, retired Navy sailor who worked as an electrician on various ships for more than 20 years. As I watched the American blondes beat on the Spanish brunettes, I decided to check in with the guys and pulse them. In the back of my mind I was thinking about the encounter with Angela a few years prior, so I approached the two fellows and asked them who they thought were going to win.
“Oh, the Americans, of course.” They said.
“Geez,” I replied “I didn’t even notice that those two girls were Americans. Hell, when I asked the question, I meant, ‘who’s going to win, the blondes or the brunettes?”
So now I’ve got the two guys laughing as we discuss the merits of blondes vs. brunettes and all agree that the blonde chicks are better athletes and will beat the brunettes from Spain.
“Man, those motherfuckin’ blond women!” the other guy kept saying over and over.
No sooner had we agreed on this topic of vital national interest, then one of the office blondes, Teri comes walking over, sipping a latte. Teri had been with the company for over 30 years as a graphic artist. Blonde and blue eyed, she had put on some weight over the years but still looked great, despite being well into her 60s. Like most blondes she had fabulous legs and I always took the time to remind her of that. But my real attraction to Teri was on account of her threatening to beat the shit out of Edy, my Puerto Rican lover, about 25 years earlier. We’ll save that for another blog entry.
Well, I couldn’t help but roping Teri into the blonde vs. brunette conversation and she eagerly took the bait. "Who's going to win?" she asked, repeating the question we had asked her, "The blondes, of course!!" she said with a big smile.
Well, the four of us chatted for some time, thoroughly enjoying the match as the blonde American gals hammered the dark haired Spaniards.
But here’s is the funny thing. As I prepared for this week’s blog entry I did some research and discovered that in women’s beach volleyball during the 2012 London Olympics, it was actually brunettes who dominated the blondes, not the other way around.
That’s right.
I looked up every team as part of my research; 24 teams in all played. Of those, 13 teams were a pair of blondes, seven teams were a pair of brunettes, and four teams were mixed: one blonde and one brunette. After going through the results of every game, I determined that there were 26 matches that featured two blondes against two brunettes and that the brunettes won 17 of those matches while the blondes won only nine. Yup, the brunettes won 65% of the matches against the blondes: not even close.
 |
| THE NUMBERS DON'T LIE |
I tried breaking down the numbers different ways to include eliminating Asians (China and Mauritius) from the analysis but that didn’t really change the overall outcome, the blondes still only won about a third of the matches.
Now it is true that blonde teams defeated mixed teams at a slightly higher rate than the brunettes did, but that’s not a very convincing statistic.
So why on that day last August, did we all think the blondes were really the better athletes? I don’t know the answer to that.
But they do have better legs, that I know for a fact.
Just to save you the trouble, here are some You Tube links I know you’ll enjoy.
Brazilian brunettes defeat Dutch blondes
Brazilian brunettes defeat German blondes
Italian brunettes defeat British blondes
Brazilian brunettes defeat Czech Blondes
-------------------------------------------------------
Revised schedule:
Feb
2-- 20th anniversary
9 -- Athletics
16 -- The Real Deal, So Ensure Your Radar is Turned On
23 -- Olympic Summary
Mar
2 -- Kissin' cousins
9 -- The Real Deal, The Girl across the Street
16 -- NO POST - SPRING VACATION
23 -- Checkmate
30 -- Head scissors
Apr
6 -- The Real Deal, once again
13 -- Ron & Jeff
20 -- Athleticism
27 -- Cruising around Wikipedia
May
4 -- The Real Deal, revisited
11 -- Westerns, part 1
18 -- The Warring Tribes
25 -- Who were these people in the photo?
Jun
1 -- Foreign Movies
8 -- The Real Deal, part ?
15 -- Kansas City Here I Cum, part 1
22 -- Kansas City Here I Cum, part 2
29 -- Kansas City Here I Cum, part 3
July
6 -- Foreign movies, various spy flicks
13 -- The Real Deal yet again
20 -- The Awesome Martine Beswick
27 -- SUMMER BREAK
Aug
3 -- SUMMER BREAK
10 -- SUMMER BREAK
17 -- Secretaries
24 -- Classic B&W
31 -- Don't Get into a Knife Fight with a blonde
Sep
7 -- Total Recall
14 -- The Real Deal again
21 -- Various peplum
28 -- Dr. Woodruff
Oct -- it's been a year now
6 -- Action flicks
13 -- More oaters
20 -- Don't Get Into a Swordfight with a blonde
27 -- The survey
Nov
9 -- The Real Deal once more
23 -- Football rematch
Dec
7 -- The Real Deal in a Ring
21 -- Scissors
According to my personal experience, blondes usually win sport competitions especially if it's a martial sport. I think it'd be better if you expand your statistics to a wider level. I was recently searching youtube for real life blonde vs brunette fights and blondes came on top 22-3.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments and YES! I do intend on taking a look at a wider level in the future.
ReplyDelete